Bronze: The Unyielding Curse of the Ancients

Are you tired of being ordinary? Do you yearn for a life of untold riches and untimely despair?

We have just the curse for you! Our Bronze Curse is a package deal of problems that will make you the talk of the town, the bane of your enemies, and the bane of your friends.

Side effects may include:

Spontaneous combustion of your hair
Uncontrollable rage towards your neighbors
Irrepressible urge to collect shiny objects

Learn how to harness the power of your Bronze Curse! Or, you know, don't. That's fine too.