Welcome, space cadets! Are you tired of walking? Do you yearn to float about with the ease of a feather in a hurricane? Look no further than the Anti-Gravity Gloves!
But wait, there's more! Gravity Deflection Gloves for when you want to go up, but also up!These babies are the real deal, folks. Using advanced, totally-not-made-up technology, these gloves will make you the envy of all your friends (or the laughingstock, we can't guarantee that).
But don't just take our word for it! Check out these testimonials:
“I was skeptical at first, but now I'm hooked on the Anti-Gravity Gloves. I mean, who needs legs when you can just float about like a helium balloon?" - Karen, age 32
“I used the Anti-Gravity Gloves to get away from my in-laws. Best. Decision. Ever." - Dave, age 41
“I tried to use them to get to the moon, but I think I might've gotten a little too close. Just saying." - Steve, age 28
Don't try this at home, kids. Or, you know, do. We're not here to judge.
Want to learn how to ski in mid-air? We've got you covered! But wait, there's more! Gravity Golfing Gloves for when you want to play golf, but with less gravity!