Pitfall Statistics - A Study of Gravity's Fury

Survival Rate	0.0032%
Average Time Spent in Pit	3.5 hours
Average Distance from Last Meal	300 feet
Number of Spontaneous Combustions	4.2 per hour
Average Number of Broken Limbs	2.1 per person
Percentage of Survivors with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder	98.7%

Don't say we didn't warn you. The statistics are clear: you're going to die in the pit. But hey, at least you'll have a good story to tell. Maybe next time you'll make it out.