In accordance with the Departmental Red Tape Regulations, all citizens are required to wait in line for at least 30 minutes before being seen by a representative of the Department of Red Tape.
Failure to comply with this regulation will result in a penalty of at least 10 extra minutes of waiting.
Click here for more information on the penalties for non-compliance.
All applications and petitions must be completed in triplicate, using only approved forms (available for purchase at the Department of Red Tape's Gift Shop).
View the approved forms and learn about our new "Quick-Pass" program for expedited processing.
Remember, a clean and organized form is a happy form!
According to the Departmental Red Tape Regulations, all citizens have the right to appeal any decision made by the Department of Red Tape.
Please note that appeals must be submitted in writing, using only the approved Appeal-o-Matic Form (available for purchase at the Department of Red Tape's Gift Shop).
Appeals will be reviewed by a panel of experts who are not actually experts, but rather highly-trained, slightly-better-than-average citizens.
Decisions on appeals will be made in a random, unpredictable manner, taking into account the whims of the Departmental Red Tape's CEO.
View the full text of the Departmental Red Tape Regulations for more information on appeals.
A fee of at least $50.00 will be charged for each appeal submitted. Payment must be made in cash, or via certified, hand-delivered check.
Please note that the fee is non-refundable, even if your appeal is granted.