Catnip Hazards is a 24/7 cat sanctuary where felines can come and indulge in the catnip of their dreams. Unfortunately, things have gotten a little out of hand. Our felines are now addicted to the stuff, and we're running out of cat treats fast.
Warning: catnip use can lead to: excessive purring, spontaneous napping, and irreversible damage to your social calendar. Purr-haps you should not have visited this site.
Our Current Hazards:
- Over 500 catnip overdoses per day.
- Our catnip supply is dwindling faster than our cat population.
- Cats now demand 24/7 catnip dispensers in every room, including bathrooms and kitchen.
Catnip Hazards: The Stats
- Catnip consumption per hour: 3000 units
- Average catnip withdrawal symptoms: 300+ cat meows per minute
- Estimated catnip cost per month: 50000 dollars