Frequently Asked Questions (and Answers)

Q: What is a Ceiling Crawler?

A: A creature that has been trapped between a fascination with the ceiling and an inability to move on.

Q: What is the training process like?

A: Intensive. We use a combination of positive reinforcement, cognitive behavioral therapy, and duct tape to keep them off the ceiling.

Q: Are Ceiling Crawler training sessions effective?

A: Yes, but only if you define "effective" as "not crawling on the ceiling for 3 hours straight without incident."