Welcome to the Cemetery of Regrets, where the dearly departed come to rest in eternal discomfort.
Q: What happens when I die?
A: You don't. Not yet, anyway. We're still working on it.
Q: Can I visit my loved ones here?
A: Only if they're not still paying their alimony. Otherwise, they're not welcome.
Q: Is it true that the afterlife is just a big waiting room for the apocalypse?
A: That's just a rumor started by a disgruntled spirit.