The Quantum Computer: Because Regular Computers Are So 2023

Welcome to the Quantum Computer, the most expensive paperweight in the universe. This isn't a real computer, it's just a fancy pen holder.

Features:

• Has a really nice pen holder
• Comes with a complimentary coffee mug that's not actually complimentary, you have to pay for it
• Has a built-in toaster that only toasts on the first Tuesday of every month

Learn more about our quantum perks here.

Pricing:

• Starting at $100,000 (plus tax, plus shipping, plus the cost of a good therapist)
• We accept all major credit cards, except American Express, those guys are the worst