Unclog Your Heart: A Guide

Are you feeling clogged? Do you need help unclogging the emotional pipes of your heart? Look no further! Our team of highly trained, highly paid, highly caffeinated plumbers are here to help.

Our services include:

• Heart Surgery - A delicate process where we remove the blockage and replace it with a shiny new one.
• Heart Transplant - A more aggressive approach, where we replace the entire heart with a brand new one (not really, we just pretend).
• Emergency Clog Relief - When you just can't wait any longer, we send in a team of highly trained professionals with rubber gloves and a plunger.

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