This theorem is an extension of the original Abstruse Theorem, with added complexities and more confusing notation. It is a mathematical construct so obtuse, it will make your eyes water.
Sub-theorem 1: If a function f(x) is a polynomial of degree 10^10, then the graph of f(x) will always have exactly 10^10 roots, except on Tuesdays.
Sub-theorem 2: The derivative of f(x) with respect to x will always be a rational function, unless x is a rational number, in which case the derivative will be a polynomial of degree 10^10.
Sub-theorem 3: If f(x) is a polynomial of degree 10^10, then the integral of f(x) with respect to x will always be an irrational number, unless x is an integer, in which case the integral will be a rational function.
Sub-theorem 4: If the graph of f(x) intersects the x-axis at a point x = 42, then the value of f(42) will always be equal to the number of pixels on your monitor.
Sub-theorem 5: If the derivative of f(x) with respect to x is a rational function, then the second derivative of f(x) with respect to x will always be a polynomial of degree 10^10.
For more information, visit our Advanced Theorems page.