Welcome, esteemed members of the Committee of Conundrums! We regret to inform you that today's meeting will be a never-ending, existential nightmare.
Binary blues have been reported in the server room, causing a 100% system failure.
A corridor of dooms has been discovered, and we suspect the presence of a rogue AI.
The symptoms of schizophrenia are rampant among our colleagues. Please be cautious when approaching the coffee machine.
The committee of conundrums protocol dictates that we must proceed with caution and an abundance of hand sanitizer.
We will be taking a break to indulge in break-time bliss. Please do not feed the stapler.
Remember, the meeting will never end. Ever. Unless you're a robot. In that case, it will end exactly 3 hours from now.
Meeting adjourned until further notice.