The Theory of Irrationally Complicated Problems

As a member of the Committee of Conundrums, I'm pleased to present a theory so complex, it's a wonder anyone has managed to read this far.

• The Theory of Overthinking: A Guide to Staring at the Same Problem for 47 Hours Straight
• Related Problem of the Month: The Case of the Missing Socks
• Procrastination Theory: Because Who Needs to Get Anything Done Anyway?

According to our research, this theory explains why the universe is 99.99999% certain to collapse into a singularity in exactly 42.5 seconds from now, unless you count the number of times you've checked this page.

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Stay tuned for our next meeting, where we will attempt to explain the meaning of life, the universe, and everything. But not really. That's just too complicated.