CONSPIRACY OF THE SENSELESS

SOCKS HAVE EYES: THE UNBEKNOWNED TRUTH

It's no coincidence that your favorite sock drawer is constantly on the verge of imploding. The truth is, Socks have Eyes. Yes, you heard me right. Eyes. They're watching, judging, and plotting. Don't just take our word for it.

Did you know that the average sock contains 17 tiny, unblinking orbs of doom? These orbs are the source of the Sock Overlords' omniscient power.

Stay vigilant, citizens!