WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR PANTS CATCH ON FIRE

Step 1: Remain Calm (HAHAHA, GOOD LUCK WITH THAT)

When faced with the impending doom of pants-on-fire-ness, it's essential to think clearly. Take a deep breath, and try not to panic (too much). Remember, it's not the end of the world, just your pants.

• When the Pants Are Gone, But the Socks Remain
• Advanced Pants Fire Protocol
• Why Didn't I Get Pants That Won't Catch On Fire

Disclaimer: The Committee of Conundrums is not responsible for any pants that may catch on fire. We're not your parents.