The Paradoxical Proposal: Section 3

Subsection: The Great Chicken Nugget Debacle

As we all know, the committee's latest paradox-reduction team has been tasked with solving the age-old conundrum of the Chicken Nugget Paradox.

After months of deliberation, we have come up with a revolutionary new solution: a machine that converts chicken nuggets into actual chickens. It's genius, we tell you.

However, our research team has discovered a few minor side effects: the machine tends to turn the chickens into slightly-better-than-average accountants. It's a small price to pay, we say.

Proceed to Section 4: The Chicken Accountant Conundrum Or, for the love of all things sane, go back to Section 2: The Original Proposal

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Will the machine turn all chickens into accountants?

A: No, only 37% of them. The rest will still be delicious and not mildly competent.

Q: Can I use the machine to turn my cat into an accountant?

A: No, that's not how this works. You need to start with chicken nuggets.