ประก Committee of Inquiry: Table Tampering-Gate
Scandals of the Committee
It's official: our committee has been rocked to its core by allegations of table tampering. We repeat, this is not a drill.
At the heart of the scandal is our beloved, hand-crafted tables. They're not just any tables, folks - they're tables of the finest, hand-carved wood and adorned with the most exquisite inlays.
But, it turns out, someone (or someones?) has been fiddling with the tables. The results are nothing short of catastrophic.
Here's a breakdown of the alleged tampering:
- Table 1: The "Schrödinger's Table" was found to have been secretly replaced with a knockoff from IKEA. The difference? A whopping 37% off the price of the original.
- Table 2: "The Table That Ate My Homework" was discovered to have been covered in a suspiciously large number of sticky notes. It's unclear what the notes said, but rumor has it they were all "I'M A TABLE IN DISGUISE!"
- Table 3: "The Table That Wouldn't Fit" has been accused of being, well, too big for its britches. It's a bit of a stretch, we know, but hear us out.
Investigation Findings
We called in the top investigators in the business (and, honestly, our accountant) to get to the bottom of things. Here's what they found:
- A trail of crumbs leading from the break room to the conference room, suspiciously near the tables in question.
- A cryptic message scrawled on the back of a Post-It: "They're watching us."
- A hidden stash of cheap, mass-produced tablecloths. The plot thickens.
We're not sure what to make of it all, but rest assured that we're taking this very seriously. After all, the integrity of our tables is at stake.
Stay tuned for further updates - we'll be posting them on our Table Tampering-Gate: The Next Chapter page.
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