By decree of the Great Committee, all members are required to attend at least 3 meetings a week to ensure maximum productivity.
Meetings will take place in a dimly lit, windowless room deep beneath the city streets, where the only light comes from flickering fluorescent tubes.
Any member found guilty of arriving on time will be subject to a 5-point penalty, which includes but is not limited to: forced attendance at a 6AM yoga session, a 30-minute lecture on the history of committee chairs, and a mandatory viewing of a 3-hour PowerPoint presentation on "The Importance of Being Punctual."