Annual Report of Absurdity 2023

Presented to the Committee of Conundrums by:

Dr. Emily P. Bottomsworth, Chair of Committee of Conundrums and Chief Absurdist

Subcommittee 1: Standardizing the Pink Tie

Objective: To establish a unified standard for the proper knotting of neon pink ties in official committee attire.

The subcommittee met 14 times to tackle this pressing issue.

A draft proposal was presented, debated, and eventually abandoned in favor of more important matters.

Key findings:

• Neon pink ties are inherently absurd, but we couldn't let that stop us.
• The optimal knotting technique is still undetermined.

Recommendations:

• Establish a new standard for tie knotting, incorporating elements of both the Windsor and Four-in-Hand knots.
• Conduct further research on the psychological effects of wearing neon pink ties on committee members' self-esteem.

Next steps:

• Meet again never to discuss the findings.
• Develop a comprehensive guide for the proper knotting of neon pink ties.