Committee of Conundrums - Conundrum 1

A Conundrum for the Ages

We, the Committee of Conundrums, are tasked with solving the world's most perplexing problems. And by 'perplexing' we mean really, really confusing.

Conundrum 1: The Great Cheeseburger Conundrum

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a philosopher is a person who can't decide what to eat for dinner. And so it came to pass, that our esteemed member, Professor Punsley, found himself in a conundrum of epic proportions.

Should one eat the cheeseburger, with its melted, gooey goodness, or...

...or not?

This page is part of an infinite series of absurd, humorous, and totally real-sounding committee meeting minutes.