Our consulting services come at a price, and that price is steep. But don't worry, we'll make sure you're worth every penny!
Our standard consulting fee is 1000% of the GDP of a small country. But hey, someone's gotta pay for our foosball table.
For those on a budget, we also offer a "Pay-Per-Word" plan. It's like a timeshare, but with more meetings.
And for the truly frugal, we've got a "Consulting-by-the-Mile" package. We'll drive around your city, consulting as we go, and charge you per mile.