The Ominous Forecast

According to our highly unscientific, totally-not-a-crystal-ball-gazing, utterly-not-reliable forecast, the following doom is imminent:

Tomorrow: Sudden and inexplicable disappearance of the office coffee machine.
Next Tuesday: Unexpected and unannounced meeting of the Committee of Conundrums, scheduled to last 3 hours and 14 minutes.
Thursday: Unprecedented shortage of available toilet paper in the break room.

And, as if that weren't enough, our crack team of experts has also predicted:

The imminent arrival of the dreaded "IT" department, armed with an arsenal of clipboards and a penchant for jargon.
The certain-to-happen, utterly-inevitable, and completely-unavoidable "reorganization" of the entire office.

We'll be keeping you updated with the latest, greatest, and most utterly-made-up forecast. Stay tuned!