John: The Unspectacular Life of a Committee Member

Back to the Committee of Conundrums

Personal Highlights

• Spends 8 hours a week in meetings
• Has a 3-hour commute
• Still uses a flip phone

Notable Achievements

• Survived 12 consecutive meetings without falling asleep
• Achieved a 5-minute response rate to emails from 30 minutes
• Managed to eat a whole pizza by himself in one sitting during a meeting

Quotes

"I don't know why they call it a 'committee'. We're just a group of people talking to each other for hours."

"I'd rather get a root canal without anesthesia than attend another one of these things."