Treasurer

Where do we even get our money from? Is it from the secret underground vaults of the world's most prolific couch potatoes?

Or perhaps it's from the sale of our infamous "I'm-withheld" stock options.

Recent Financial Decisions

1. Invested in "I-told-you-so" bonds. They're paying off!
2. Bought 10,000 shares of "I-can't-believe-we-still-haven't-changed-the-bulletin-board" stock. It's a real growth opportunity.
3. Spent all our funds on novelty tie purchases. Because, priorities.

Meet our esteemed treasurer, Biographer, who's been tasked with the impossible job of making sense of it all.