Witness Statement:
I, Jane Doe, hereby swear under penalty of perdition, that on this day, the 13th of February, at approximately 14:47:00, I did behold with prophets of mine own eyes, a Sock Ninja, in all its glory. The Sock Ninja, a creature feared throughout the land for its uncanny ability to vanish into thin air, leaving naught but a trail of missing socks in its wake, did make a most peculiar appearance in my laundry room.
It did appear as a dark, shadowy figure, with an aura of malevolent intent, and a most unsettling tendency to pilfer all manner of socks, regardless of color, pattern,_goals, or size. I did attempt to apprehend the creature, but it did prove most elusive, leaving me with naught but a trail of missing socks, and a most dire sense of foreboding.
I do hereby request that this witness statement be taken into account, and that the Sock Ninja be brought to justice, lest it continue to plague the good people of this fair city with its most heinous crime of sock-napping.
May the socks of the innocent be ever in their rightful places.