Welcome, esteemed members of the Committee of Conundrums, to the most baffling, the most confounding, the most utterly absurd enigma of modern times: the Mysterious Case of the Mower Lobby.
It started with a series of inexplicable occurrences: mowers would go missing, only to reappear with a faint scent of gasoline and a cryptic message scrawled on the blade: "They're watching us."
A task force of the most brilliant minds in the field was formed to unravel the mystery. Our team has been investigating for weeks, and the results are... perplexing.
Theory One: The Mower Lobby is a Secret Society of Lawn Enthusiasts Theory Two: The Mower Lobby is a Front for a Shadowy Plot to Control the World's Lawns Theory Three: The Mower Lobby is Actually a Group of Mischievous PrankstersStay tuned for further updates, or don't. We're not really sure what's going on either.
Latest Updates Press Release: Mower Lobby Enigma Deepens