Hamster Crisis Management Teams

Hamster Crisis Protocol

In the event of a hamster crisis, follow these steps:

• Identify the hamster's distress call
• Assess the situation and determine the severity of the crisis
• Deploy a crisis management team to the scene
• Implement the Hamster Crisis Protocol (HCP) to resolve the crisis

Crisis Management Teams

Our teams are equipped with the latest in hamster-whispering technology and are ready to deploy at a moment's notice:

• Hamster Crisis Management Team Alpha
• Hamster Crisis Management Team Bravo
• Hamster Crisis Management Team Charlie

View all teams