Send us your suggestions, complaints, and existential crises. We'll get right on it.
Learn about our mission to do nothing, or
Meet the staff who are just here for the free coffee.
Alternatively, just send us a carrier pigeon. We're on the 5th floor, in the room with the "Do Not Enter" sign.
Address: 123 Pointless Lane, Nowheresville, USA
Phone: 1-800-DO-NOTHING
Email: info@pointlesscommitteeaffairs.gov
Or, if you're feeling fancy, just send a carrier pigeon. We'll get it. Eventually. Maybe.