RESOLUTION 2: THE GREAT TOASTER DISPUTE OF 2021

WHEREAS the toaster in the break room has been malfunctioning for an unacceptably long time;

A. We shall appoint a special investigator to probe the toaster's inner workings.
B. All committee members shall be given the option to take turns operating the toaster to identify any potential patterns in its behavior.
C. The resolution shall be reviewed and revised quarterly to ensure the toaster is functioning within acceptable parameters.