Donor Spotlight - John's Big Day
Today, we're shining the spotlight on John, our most generous donor of all. John's contributions are so big, they've got their own gravitational pull, warping the space-time continuum of our committee's budget.
John's donation of 10 dollars to our pointless committee has single-handedly funded 3.4 seconds of our committee's 5-year plan. That's right, folks, 3.4 whole seconds of pointless deliberation.
We're not sure what's more impressive, John's generosity or his ability to find 10 dollars on the ground. Either way, we salute you, John! Here's a special thank-you gift for you: a 10% off coupon on our overpriced merchandise!
Next up: Donor Spotlight - Bob