html Bureaucratic Red Tape Tips - Step 5: Write a Press Release that No One Will Ever Read

Bureaucratic Red Tape Tips

Step 5: Write a Press Release that No One Will Ever Read

Congratulations! You've made it to Step 5 of our 10-Step Guide to Writing a Press Release that will be Immediately Ignored by the Press!

Here's a sample press release that's sure to be met with the same enthusiasm as a hostage situation:

Sample Press Release:

Subject: We're Not Doing Anything Interesting Today

Dear Press Corps,

We're not doing anything interesting today.

No, really. Nothing at all. Just the usual bureaucratic drivel.

Thanks for your time.

No, seriously, we mean it. We're really not doing anything.

Next Step: Create Irrelevant Data About Us: A Committee of Highly Trained Experts in Doing Nothing