Committee on the Secret Service for Pineapples

Agenda Item 1: Does Pineapple Need a Secret Service?

The committee convened to discuss the pressing issue of whether pineapples should be granted a secret service. After heated debates, the majority voted in favor of creating a clandestine organization dedicated to protecting pineapples from the dangers of fruit salad, fruit ninja attacks, and other covert threats.

The committee also voted to create a special task force to investigate the alleged pineapple conspiracy involving the pineapple upside-down cake.

Subcommittee Report: Pineapple Spies

Subcommittee members reported that they have infiltrated several pineapple farms, gathering intel on the pineapple underground network.

Their findings include:

• Pineapples have developed a sophisticated communication system using Morse code and fruit-shaped semaphore flags.
• Pineapples have been secretly funding research on pineapple-themed theme park rides, including the 'Pineapple Express' roller coaster.
• There is a pineapple-led cabal planning to overthrow the current fruit bowl regime.

Recommendations include:

• Establishing a Pineapple Secret Service (PSS) to counter the pineapple threat.
• Deploying pineapple-trained agents to gather more intel.