Round 1, 2024 Season
| Player 1: B. McSplosionface | Position: Goalie |
| Player 2: C. T. Punsley | Position: Quarterback |
| Player 3: D. E. Quirk | Position: Linebacker |
| Player 4: E. V. Puzzlement | Position: Wide Reciever |
View more absurd rosters: /team-12-roster-more