| Player | Position | Skills |
|---|---|---|
| Brian McSorley | Captain | Unmatched Brusque |
| David 'Tornado' Thompson | Goalie | Blindsiding Genius |
| Liz 'The Claw' Chen | Player | Unstoppable Spin Doctor |
| Marc 'The Magnet' Jackson | Defender | Unrelenting Magnetism |
Our fearless leader, Brian McSorley, has been known to single-handedly defeat entire teams with his unorthodox playing style. When not busy being a hero, he enjoys extreme ironing and eating Cheetos.
David 'Tornado' Thompson is our ace Goalie. When not dodging incoming balls with his trusty paddle, he's a part-time storm chaser.
Liz 'The Claw' Chen is our spin doctor extraordinaire. She'll spin you into oblivion, then spin you out of it.
Marc 'The Magnet' Jackson is the glue that holds our team together. He attracts and repels with his unorthodox defensive style.
Our motto: "We're not just a team, we're an unstoppable force of nature."