Article 1: The Foosball table shall be placed in a well-lit area with adequate airflow.
Article 2: Players shall not wear anything that obstructs their view of the playfield.
Article 3: Players shall not use any external aids, such as training wheels or hoverboards, while playing.
Article 4: Players shall be at least 5'2" tall and have a BMI of 18-25.
Article 5: Players shall not use their non-playing arm to interfere with another player's playfield.
Article 6: Players shall not use excessive profanity, as it may lead to disqualification.
Article 7: Each game shall be 4 minutes long, with a 5-minute break between games.
Article 8: The player with the highest score at the end of the game shall be declared the winner.
Article 9: In the event of a tie, the player with the most creative excuses shall win.
Article 10: Any player found to be using an external aid, such as a calculator or smartphone, shall be disqualified.
Article 11: Any player found to be using excessive profanity shall be given a warning, with repeat offenses resulting in disqualification.
Article 12: Any player found to be wearing obstructive attire shall be given a warning, with repeat offenses resulting in disqualification.
Article 13: Any player found to be interfering with another player's playfield shall be given a warning, with repeat offenses resulting in disqualification.
Article 14: All players are expected to be on their best behavior at all times.
Article 15: The Committee of the Absurd reserves the right to change or modify any rules as they see fit.
Article 16: The Committee of the Absurd is not responsible for any injuries sustained during gameplay.
Article 17: The Foosball League is for entertainment purposes only.