Committee Foolsball League Rules

Section 8: The Actual Rules

Article 1: Foolsball Frenzy

1. Players must wear matching neon green jumpsuits at all times.
2. The foosball table is not a toy, but a finely tuned instrument of psychological warfare.
3. Any player who says "I'm just going to take a break to grab a snack" must actually be doing just that.

Article 2: Foolsball Fighting

1. Only the most creative uses of the term "FOOLS" will be rewarded.
2. Players must make eye contact with the opponent's marionette before attempting a shot.
3. Any player who says "I'm just going to go get some water" will be forced to drink an entire bottle of cheap cologne.

Section 9: The Actual Actual Rules (Because You Clearly Didn't Read This One)

Section 10: The Foolsball Code of Ethics (Or Not)