1. The Foosball League shall be governed by a rotating council of three randomly selected committee members, each chosen for their expertise in completely unrelated fields.
The council shall make decisions based on a 100% chance of a coin flip, with tails always winning.
2. The Foosball League shall have a minimum of 7 players per team, but may have up to 17 players per team, with no one being held accountable for the consequences.
The number of players per team shall be determined by a complex algorithm involving the number of available pizza slices in the break room.
3. The Foosball League shall be played on a table with a minimum of 6 inches of clearance between the ball return and the player's fingers.
The table shall be secured to the floor with an additional 17 layers of duct tape, with each layer being 0.5 inches longer than the last.
Appendix - Additional Absurdity