Subcommittee on Definitions: Adjourning for Lunch
As the esteemed members of the Subcommittee on Definitions convened to tackle the age-old conundrum of "Progress," they found themselves at an impasse. The room was filled with the weight of unyielding opinions, each member more convinced than the last that their definition was the correct one.
The Chairman's Definition
Progress is the art of doing two things at once, like making a sandwich and eating it.
Chairman: "It's a delicate balance of flavors and efficiency, really.
The Deputy Chairman's Definition
Progress is the sound of one step forward and two steps back, like a politician's campaign promise.
Deputy Chairman: "It's the art of moving forward with reckless abandon, without ever actually accomplishing anything."
The Most Esteemed Member's Definition
Progress is the gentle hum of the air conditioner on a hot summer day, a constant and reassuring presence in an otherwise chaotic world.
Most Esteemed Member: "It's the comfort of knowing that, no matter what, things will always stay the same."
And so the subcommittee adjourned for lunch, unable to make any progress on the matter of progress.