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SCIENCE COMMITTEE FOR SCIENCE'S SAKE: Snack Time Protocol Amendments

By order of the Supreme Science Council, the following amendments to the Snack Time Protocol have been ratified:

  • A new, more efficient method for determining the optimal snack-to-meeting-ratio will be implemented.
  • The minimum snack duration for committee meetings has been reduced to 17 minutes and 32 seconds.
  • A new, highly-caffeinated beverage will be provided for all committee members during meetings.
  • The committee's mascot, "Sciencey McScienceface," has been officially recognized as the embodiment of scientific excellence.

Relevant Committee Decisions

The following decisions have been made regarding the Snack Time Protocol:

  • Resolution 1: The committee has determined that pizza is, in fact, the optimal snack food for all meetings.
  • Resolution 2: The committee has established that the optimal meeting duration is directly proportional to the amount of snacks consumed.
  • Resolution 3: Sciencey McScienceface has been officially designated as the Snack Time Protocol's Chief Snack Officer.

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