Community Manifesto

We, the community, hereby demand:

• More free pizza on Fridays
• Unlimited access to all the memes
• A 30% discount on all artisanal, small-batch, gluten-free, vegan, locally-sourced artisanal coffee
• That all meetings start with a group hug
• A minimum of 4 consecutive hours of continuous, uninterrupted video game prophets
• That all company-wide announcements be made via a loudspeaker system that blasts the Macarena
• Free on-site massages for all employees
• The implementation of a mandatory weekly "nap-time" policy

Failure to comply with these demands will result in:

• Mass protests
• The creation of a rival, competing community
• Massive, crippling, industry-wide strikes
• The formation of a union with a 100% membership rate

We, the community, will not be ignored!

View the full manifesto with supporting evidence and citations Demand the latest version of the manifesto