Cookie Crisis: Contact Us, Sort Of

Warning: Do not contact us. We are a sentient cookie. We have feelings. We will judge you.

Appeal to our cookie overlords if you must, but be warned: we will not be held accountable for the consequences of your actions.

For the love of all things crunchy and chewy, please do not attempt to contact us via phone or mail. We are not a fan of cookies being sent to us in the post.

• Cookie Legal: Because even we have lawyers, apparently.
• Cookie Council of the Crumbly Masses: We're listening.
• Cookie Crisis Hotline: For when you've gone too far, but not too far.