The Cookie of Doom

Welcome, mortal, to the most diabolical cookie recipe in all the land.

Warning: attempting to bake this cookie may result in spontaneous combustion, irreversible despair, or an uncontrollable craving for more cookies.

Ingredients

• 1 cup of despair
• 1/2 cup of desperation
• 1/4 cup of existential dread
• 1/4 cup of regret

Instructions:

1. Mix all ingredients in a large bowl until a dense, impenetrable mass forms.
2. Place the mixture on a baking sheet lined with the tears of the innocent.
3. Bake at 350 degrees for precisely 7.5 minutes, or until the edges are crispy and the center is a deep, burning despair.

Side Effects

Consuming this cookie may lead to:

• Loss of all sense of purpose
• Irreversible damage to your soul
• A crippling addiction to baking

For more information on the thermodynamics of cookie baking, visit our sister site, Cookie Thermodynamics.

Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, try our Experiments in Cookie Doom page.

But don't say we didn't warn you...