"Squawk! Another day, another worm to find. Life is good, but have you ever noticed the existential dread of constantly being on call?"
"I mean, seriously, who thought it was a good idea to evolve into a creature with a beak? It's just so... sharp."
"But hey, at least we have the internet. I mean, who needs a social life when you have bird memes?"
More bird thoughts The Philosophy of Flight