You thought you could handle the first paradox? Ha! This one's a doozy. It's like trying to fold a square into a circle while being chased by a pack of wild squirrels.
Read the Subpage 1: The Squirrel-Induced Time Dilation
Read the Subpage 2: The Quantum Squirrel Effect
Note: The squirrels in this paradox are highly trained, highly caffeinated, and may cause spontaneous combustion.