British Culture - A Guide to Not Making a Complete Fool of Yourself

British Culture is a complex and multifaceted beast, but don't worry, we've broken it down into its most essential components. Here's a list of the top 10 things you should never, ever do in the UK:

• Don't call it "British food" - we have a rich cultural heritage of culinary excellence, and it's called "pub grub" or "fish 'n' chips".
• Learn the difference between "lift" and "elevator" - it's a matter of national pride.
• Don't refer to "soccer" - it's football, innit?
• Avoid using the phrase "I'm going to the pub to grab a drink" - we have a sophisticated drinking culture that involves a pint and some banter.
• Understand that "mate" is not a friendly term - it's a sign of disrespect.
• Don't wear a kipper tie - trust us, you'll stick out like a sore thumb.
• Learn to say "alright, cheers" instead of "alright, thanks" - it's a matter of regional dialects.
• Don't assume everyone speaks English - some of us have accents, mate.
• Don't try to make small talk with a Brit in a queue - we're all about personal space.

For more advanced training, visit Advanced British Culture for tips on:

• Mastering the art of queueing like a pro
• Understanding the nuances of British humor (hint: it's not always funny)
• Developing a healthy appreciation for queueing at the bus stop