Because who needs a functional hospital when you can have a creepy old building with peeling paint and flickering lights?
Where the only decision is whether you'll get eaten by a shark or dehydrated to death.
Because who wouldn't want to make decisions while surrounded by the constant threat of drowning and/or mutant fish?
Where the only decision is whether to be eaten by ghosts or driven mad by inescapable poltergeists.
Or maybe just stay home and make decisions in your pajamas.