Decisions Strategies: Ask a Friend (Option 4: Consult the Oracle of Bacon)

For Option 4, you're seeking the wisdom of the Oracle of Bacon, a wise and all-knowing sage with an uncanny ability to discern the perfect course of action.

However, the Oracle of Bacon is notoriously difficult to reach, and their methods of communication are shrouded in mystery. But don't worry, we have a few tips to help you connect with this revered figure:

Step 1: Build a giant statue of yourself in the heart of the forest

Step 2: Offer a basket of fine meats to the local squirrel population

Step 3: Perform an interpretive dance of great import

Remember, the key to success lies not only in the method, but also in the willingness to appear ridiculous. Good luck, friend!