What is the Atomic Bag?

It's a bag that's gone atomic, man. Like, it's got all the radiation.

Why is it so atomic?

Because it's like, radioactive. Duh.

How do I clean it?

Don't. Just stare at it until it gets clean. Like, just sit there and contemplate the futility of existence.

What happens if I lose it?

The world ends. Like, literally. The skies turn to ash, the seas turn to lava, and the trees all grow giant tentacles.

Where can I buy one?

Sorry, not sorry. They're sold out. Like, sold out of the universe.