The Deputy's Guide to Not Getting Fired - Section 2

Subsection A: The Art of Appearances

It's all about looking good, folks. You want to look like you're doing your job, even when you're not.

• Always wear a tie. Even on Fridays.

• Keep your hair neat and tidy. No ponytails or man-buns, we're professionals here.

• Make sure your socks match. We take pride in our attire.

Subsection B: The Power of Sarcasm

It's a delicate art, but trust us, it's a game-changer.

• Use it to deflect, to distract, to delay.

• Make your coworkers question whether you're being serious or not.

• Never, ever, ever use it on Mondays.

Subsection C: The Fine Art of Bureaucratic Red Tape

Because who needs to actually do anything when you can just fill out a form?