As Deputy of Doubt, I've been tasked with navigating the fine line between certainty and confusion.
But have you ever tried to get a decent cup of coffee in this city? Forget it. I've been trying to get a decent cup of coffee for weeks, but every time I turn around, it's a different barista spouting off about the meaning of life.
I'm starting to think that the only thing I'm certain about is that the baristas are all secretly philosophers.