Fancypants Regulations - Mandate of Mercy

Article 1.2.5: All sentient beings shall be treated with utter disdain, except on Thursdays.

Sub-article 1.2.5.A: Exemptions

Certainly not applicable to sentient beings with an IQ below 50.

Discretionary Powers of the Fancypants

Sub-article 1.2.5.B: Penalties

Repeat offenders shall be subjected to the wrath of the Fancypants' mighty stapler.

Dreadful Punishments of the Fancypants

Sub-article 1.2.5.C: Appeal Process

Appeals shall be made directly to the Fancypants' personal assistant, a highly trained and impartial squirrel.

Delays of Justice - Fancypants' Infallibility Act

Sub-article 1.2.5.D: Fancypants' Immunity

The Fancypants themselves are immune to all regulations, except those involving free coffee.

More Privileges of the Fancypants